"Opinions" and "Honesty" not an exuse to be mean

 Just something that has been on my mind for a while...

So, I was remembering a time (this was like a year ago lol) I was talking to two of my class mates, I wont give names haha, about what kind of music we liked. One person asked the other girl who was with me and she said she really liked hip-hop and rnb. I totally cant stand rnb and was thinking to myself "gah that is like my LEAST favorite genre of music" but of course I didnt say this out loud because she JUST finished telling us that she really liked it, so I just smiled and said thats cool. Then I was asked what kind of music I liked, I find it kinda hard to answer this question cause I like alot of different genres so I kind of babbled a bit. But I said I really like foreign music, I love jpop and I also love heavy metal, like really heavy stuff. While I was saying this I got given the most horrified disgusted look and then got a lecture about how its horrible and you cant even hear what theyr saying and its all just "rah rah rah grrr" and they were just hardcore dissing something I JUST finished explaining to them that I really liked.
 For some reason at the time I thought it was okay because heaps of people hate metal and I should have expected that and it would have been wrong for me to bitch about rnb or hip hop because more people like it than people who hate it. But then I thought about it again later and NO it was not okay. Especially after I just held my tongue about my opinion on your favorite music.

 I get that people have the freedom of speech and they have the right to state their opinions but I think its really messed up when people will disregard others feelings JUST so they can have their opinion stated. Like, what do you even gain from that? Now im a lil bit pissed and you look like an asshole. Just so you could state your opinion.

Another time this kind of thing happened was when I got my nails done. I got them done from a friend who is a nail technician, I helped her design some business cards and she did my nails for free. I was super happy with them, they were clear acrylic blue with glitter in them and the pinky finger and the thumbs were stilleto (pointed) and the rest were squared. They were dope. Anyway, I went to class the next day, super proud of them and one of my  classmates grabs my hand and looks at them with disgust and says, way too loudly, " ugh! theyre so long! I dont know how girls get this stuff done to their nails it looks terrible! How can you do anything with these theyr like talons?!" And I sort of shrugged it off because having acrylic nails isnt exactly conventional, especially for art school. But its okay because I work better with long nails, I feel like a cripple with short nails.And I dont know I guess because I had low self esteem I kind of thought it was okay for people to say stuff like that. Again, I thought about this later and realised it was totally messed up and WRONG. This person had really short, bitten nails, like accually gross and she was judging MY nails?? My perfectly manicured, awesome nails? then I thought really, I would hate to have nails like YOURS, I dont know how people can have their nails like YOURS, not mine. That was really frikkin mean, like accually. Mean.

I really wish that at times like these, I would have realised it was horrible at the time instead of feeling like, because I was doing something that was not normal that it was okay for people to say harsh things. Unfortunatly these things happened over a year ago and I would look totally nuts if I went back to those people and hit them up about it now. Another sad thing is, is that in both of these situations these people were my friends.

I just think people have totally stopped thinking about other peoples feelings before they talk, and people think that because theyre being "honest" and stating their opinion that theyre doing the world some big favour. Honestly, nobodys opinion is more important than somebodys feelings. I dont get why people just feel this need to blurt their "opinions" to everyone. Like theyl have an annurism if they dont. What happened to the saying "If you dont have anything nice to say dont say anything at all."???

And what REALLY pisses me off is that I held my tongue, I kept my opinions to myself because I knew they were negative and that no good would come of it if I just blurted them out. I would only have pissed people off and made myself look like a dick. But I didnt get the same respect back. And now because I didnt say anything at the time those people probably think its totally fine because nobodys feelings were hurt and they were totally justified in what they said. But NO its not okay.
But its too late now lol. But at least I know for next time to stick up for myself and to realise when someone is being a bit out of line.

Now in saying that, I DO think people should have their own opinions, and do be honest and speak your mind. But just think about it. Im sure ive said things in the past that were totally un called for and I am sorry for that but I try very hard to think about what I say to people and to always make people feel comfortable and to keep an open mind of peoples interests. I feel that I should get the same respect. I just think people need to be careful, and keep an open mind. State your opinion, tell people what you think, but just dont be a dick about it lol.

Buut I guess there are some people out there who will be offended by ANYTHING. And it can be exhausting trying to filter everything you say to make it not offensive, and it wont always work, but just try your best. Thats all I ask of the world! Just try your best to be nice to people! And EVERYBODY deserves to be treated politely.

Anyway rant over. :)